polyphony.

sigh

i suppose i should be happier...

i just landed a little gig, albeit VERY temporary... but it's money in the pocket. i start on monday. it's in fuckin' manayunk, so that kinda sucks, but like i said - it's money in the pocket.

the triton is on it's way... we already recieved the sampling upgrade on friday. my brother and i were in my room, talking last night about what places we would send a demo to. i wanna go indy, so i can see some change for the inevitable dopeness i come with. *wink* i like counterflow, ubiquity, stones throw, soulspazm, and landspeed.
'cause, i mean, i'm serious about this shit. i think eventually, our musical careers will splinter, he won't need me and i won't need him. and that's cool. but i think right now, we kinda need each other, especially since this music thing is an undesireable as far as fam is concerned.

so be it.

it's cool that we can get down together on something like this. life choices and shit.

but, it seems like there is always one thing in my life that's fuckin' up. take my last blog entry. yeah, *that* one. i think that that whole thing has too much of an effect on me, the whole sex drive shit. i mean, when it gets to the point that i lose sleep and my health comes under fire, it's fuckin' dumb. and, at this point, i see no respite from my sexless situation.

so like, what good does looking at pics of naked women and fantasizing about it do? it doesn't abate. by any means. so, i'm not stressing about any more. it's funny, i was talking to a friend of mine, and she was like "just put some ice on it" referring to the ol' tender member. then she said somethng that really struck deep. she said something to the affect that "you don't have any kind of sexual outlet right now so leave it alone". and she's right, you know?

so, i am not sweating it any more. i'm sure the bouts with my overactive drive will continue, but me feeding it and wishing i was involved in some copulation; that's got to stop. i feel weak to that shit, and it pisses me off. i'ma just test myself, see how strong i can be when it comes down to it.

anyway.

i think i'll go take a shower and freshen up, head out to manayunk and see exactly where this job is...

peas and gritas.